Freya's blog

How does one* celebrate #BiVisibilityDay? This is what I've been asking myself today. And it's a bit of a conundrum because on the one hand it's supposed to be a celebration for bi** people to shout out that they exist and that they're proud of who they are. But it's also a space to speak out about the issues that affect bi people. How do we balance the two, the positives and the negatives? Do we even need to worry about balancing the two? Created on Wordcloud So I'm settling my conundrum with a list, which I find tends to be a good solution to many problems. As my contribution to this fine day of being unashamed and honest about experiences of being bisexual, here are some positives and some negatives that spring to mind about being bisexual in a heteronormative society obsessed with binaries (and sex). Let's get the negatives out of the way... That internalised biphobia that makes coming to terms with your sexuality a muuuch slower process than

I won't go into a long winded introduction about the age we live in and the way in which huge multinational chains dominate and permeate every part of our modern lives. We all know this already. We know that supporting local companies is a dying effort. We know that a lot of big brands are unethical. But this isn't what I've been thinking about lately. Rather I've noticed that always walking past and interacting with the same brands is starting to make very different life experiences feel generic. Example: recently I went on a day trip to Cardiff, to explore it a bit more and get a change of scenery. As much as I enjoyed the day, I spent most of it wandering around the centre surrounded by the same shops I would have been surrounded by if I had been in any other city centre. This isn't to say that I don't like Cardiff or that this is all there is to it. This experience is part of a larger pattern. Travelling to new places becomes less refreshing and less inspi

Am I enough for... myself? For my high standards, the pressure I put on myself, my shabby brand of perfectionism? I often have thoughts such as 'I wish I had read more books in my life' or 'why have I wasted so much time not writing when I've had plenty of opportunity to' or 'I should have kept up a high fitness level, and not quit painting or sports or card making or cycling'. And then I will bargain with myself. ' If by the age of 25 you have written a novel, gotten fit, read 300 books, travelled and rediscovered art, then, then you will be good enough.'  And this mindset limits my enjoyment of things I really love. Time that I could be spending lost in my own world writing I spend berating myself for my word count and disjointed chapters. Reading can start to feel like a race to read as much as possible, rather than a process of discovering and enjoying new authors, writing styles and ideas. Obviously, this isn't a very healthy way to li

I feel like it's probably a very British thing to be enthusiastic about seasons. But I've always found something refreshing and inspiring about entering a new 'time of year'. Currently it's 'Spring', although this season doesn't really register in my mind, as it's so, so slow to arrive. It usually feels like winter drags on and on, and then before you know it, it's sunny and bright and there's a chance it might hit 18 degrees Celsius... any... day... soon. And that says summer to me. Regardless, since the recent sunny days we've been having (at least in the south of the UK) I can sense a new perspective emerging in me. And perhaps it's because changing seasons signals time moving forward, prompting a kind of renewed approach to life. Or maybe it's just because the world simply looks different;  in a different light, with different coloured leaves on the trees and with different kinds of clothes worn by passers-by in the str

Throughout January so far, I've been playing around with a few resolution ideas. Even if I make a few initial resolutions on New Year's Eve, I tend to reflect a lot in January and come up with a load more!